Saturday, December 29, 2012

Is your addicted loved one destroying your emotions? Know this.

If you are beside yourself trying to get your loved one to end their addiction to drugs and alcohol listen up please. You are not alone. You must first never give up helping them but just make sure you are not enabling them to continue their addiction. You must use tough love on them yet also don't preach or blindly yell at them while at them same time it is very important you keep their trust. Tall order huh? Well no one is saying that getting them to quit is gonna be easy. Oh year and you must have patience to.
I know it hurts your loved one to have them in a full fledged addiction to drugs or alcohol and its hurting the family too. It is real pain and suffering dealing with addiction. When your loved one talks to you you don't know if they are lying to you or telling the truth. Everytime they leave the room to go to the bathroom or get something downstairs you don't know if they are sneaking out or not. I
experience the same thing with addicts I work very close with. It hurts. I feel for you. There is  a constant flood of emotions. Anxiety, pity, scared, hurt, exasperation and frustration all at once. That's why you want the addiction to end.
The lack of trust is the real problem. When your loved one finally does wind up in recovery you are always asking yourself and them for reassurance that "this time" it's for real. You fear your loved one may get a sexually transmitted disease or may get hurt ort passout at the wheel of a car. Or worse maybe even O D on some bad stuff, or too much stuff. The suffering is endless. Your mind may get trancefixed on a good or funny movie and forget about the issue for a while only to sudden spring back into your mind and numb your mind out again. You may get some sleep at night only to suddenly awaken and rember everything again in a sudden hurry. It hurts. Addiction is so much pain to so many. That's why I am dedicating all my time to bring you the info and support you need to get through this and get through to your loved one so that a change of direction can occur. There is not a waking moment that I don't think about the suffering and homelessness my mother went through because of her addiction to alcohol. She was a sharp witted tough woman and alcohol took away that beautiful mind. Her addiction to alcohol took her away from my brother, sister and me. There was not a day when I was a little boy that I did not worry about if she was ok. Or if she was warm and inside in the winter time. I just needed reasurrace to know that, and it was something I never got. I hurt for those I try to help, I hurt when I see thier families and children go through what I went through.

The thoughts of people hurting and suffering the streets to addiction never leaves my mind. It has placed a permanent imprint on my life. I know that you too feel the same way.

The best advice I could give you is to never give up. Do not take no for an answer. Do not get your loved one mad at you. Show them always that you love them. Tell them always that you want to help them make a change. Talk to other addicts family members and get advice and support. Find it on the web and also go to Al Anon mettings for support and also to get your emotional battery recharged. Trudge on because your loved one needs you more than they need anyone else. You must work hard to find out what issues and or disorders your loved one faces. This is where the root of the problem rests. Remember it's not the addiction that is destroying the family and the addict. It is the underlying triggers that create the compulsive pull which is causing your loved one to need to calm thier inquiet mind through addiction to substances. They are self medicating.

http://12thstep.blogspot.com/2007/12/helping-loved-one-find-recovery-from.html

http://12thstep.blogspot.com/2008/05/helping-loved-one-find-recovery-from.html
http://treatingaddiction.info

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3 comments:

Nicholas Grimaldi said...

If anyone is trying to help their loved ones for drug rehab then they must keep patience. Besides keeping patience they should give enormous support to their loved ones. First of all they must try to stop them from taking any types of drugs which they are habituated with. It may create negative effects but they should not give their hope up. You have nicely pointed out certain things which will help anyone to give their loved ones support to get rid of drug addiction.

Treating Addiction said...

Your correct Nicholas about needing to give your loved one addicted to drugs or alcohol support. Many people get upset and tell at them thinking this will help them quit using or they tell at them out of frustration. Understanding and tough love yes but don't tell out of frustration.

Treating Addiction said...

Your correct Nicholas about needing to give your loved one addicted to drugs or alcohol support. Many people get upset and tell at them thinking this will help them quit using or they tell at them out of frustration. Understanding and tough love yes but don't tell out of frustration.