If you are beside yourself trying to get your loved one to end their addiction to drugs and alcohol listen up please. You are not alone. You must first never give up helping them but just make sure you are not enabling them to continue their addiction. You must use tough love on them yet also don't preach or blindly yell at them while at them same time it is very important you keep their trust. Tall order huh? Well no one is saying that getting them to quit is gonna be easy. Oh year and you must have patience to.
I know it hurts your loved one to have them in a full fledged addiction to drugs or alcohol and its hurting the family too. It is real pain and suffering dealing with addiction. When your loved one talks to you you don't know if they are lying to you or telling the truth. Everytime they leave the room to go to the bathroom or get something downstairs you don't know if they are sneaking out or not. I
experience the same thing with addicts I work very close with. It hurts. I feel for you. There is a constant flood of emotions. Anxiety, pity, scared, hurt, exasperation and frustration all at once. That's why you want the addiction to end.
The lack of trust is the real problem. When your loved one finally does wind up in recovery you are always asking yourself and them for reassurance that "this time" it's for real. You fear your loved one may get a sexually transmitted disease or may get hurt ort passout at the wheel of a car. Or worse maybe even O D on some bad stuff, or too much stuff. The suffering is endless. Your mind may get trancefixed on a good or funny movie and forget about the issue for a while only to sudden spring back into your mind and numb your mind out again. You may get some sleep at night only to suddenly awaken and rember everything again in a sudden hurry. It hurts. Addiction is so much pain to so many. That's why I am dedicating all my time to bring you the info and support you need to get through this and get through to your loved one so that a change of direction can occur. There is not a waking moment that I don't think about the suffering and homelessness my mother went through because of her addiction to alcohol. She was a sharp witted tough woman and alcohol took away that beautiful mind. Her addiction to alcohol took her away from my brother, sister and me. There was not a day when I was a little boy that I did not worry about if she was ok. Or if she was warm and inside in the winter time. I just needed reasurrace to know that, and it was something I never got. I hurt for those I try to help, I hurt when I see thier families and children go through what I went through.
The thoughts of people hurting and suffering the streets to addiction never leaves my mind. It has placed a permanent imprint on my life. I know that you too feel the same way.
The best advice I could give you is to never give up. Do not take no for an answer. Do not get your loved one mad at you. Show them always that you love them. Tell them always that you want to help them make a change. Talk to other addicts family members and get advice and support. Find it on the web and also go to Al Anon mettings for support and also to get your emotional battery recharged. Trudge on because your loved one needs you more than they need anyone else. You must work hard to find out what issues and or disorders your loved one faces. This is where the root of the problem rests. Remember it's not the addiction that is destroying the family and the addict. It is the underlying triggers that create the compulsive pull which is causing your loved one to need to calm thier inquiet mind through addiction to substances. They are self medicating.
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Saturday, December 29, 2012
Tuesday, December 25, 2012
Christmas is a time to pause what we're doing and take break from the hectic schedules we normally follow. Lets be thankful for our health and always remember that many people who are suffering need someone in someway. If you can, try to be that someone to a person within reach who needs help. This time we all share on earth is short, so by keeping that in mind share kindness and compassion whenever you can. Love and generosity may not last forever but the times you can give it are really worth th efforts. When you lift a poor mans spirits or help a mentally ill homeless person it should lift your spirits as well. What you give comes back to you in many ways. If you are afdictef to drugs or alcohol or if your loved one is, may God grant you the help and tranquility along with the strength to conquer your battles so that your mind can rest with more comfort. Please follow my books blogs and videos for insight and tips so thst you may enjoy the serene love of living in more comfort for the rest of your journey. God Bless and I love you. John Joseph.